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Leaky Lee

11/10/2022

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       Leaky Lee knew this day would come.  He was actually surprised it hadn’t come sooner because the Smart family was just that, smart.  But, the appliance truck just turned into the driveway.  Workers hoisted up the back door, and there she was, shiny, sleek and Energy Star certified.  Electra Range smiled as she surveyed her new home.

       Inside, Lee sensed the workers disconnecting him from the gas line while Electra was wheeled in.  Lee had a few minutes with her alone before he would be taken away to the salvage yard.  There was so much he wanted to tell her.

       “Good to meet you; I’m Lee Keystove,” he began. “Welcome.  It’s clearly time for me to go; this family deserves better.  In hindsight, it’s really quite remarkable the Smarts even let a gas cook stove into their house.  Turning me on creates combustion, and combustion releases (or leaks) toxic pollutants like nitrogen dioxide (NO2), carbon monoxide and formaldehyde inside the house. 

       “A couple weeks ago Mrs. Smart rented an air monitor because she’d learned that kids in homes with gas stoves increase their risk of respiratory illnesses by 20%.  To test the level of NO2 in the house, she made a pot of tea and baked a pan of brownies.  After a half hour the monitor indicated there were 207 parts per billion (ppb) of NO2 in the air.  That’s almost TWICE the maximum amount recommended by the World Health Organization!  It didn’t take the Smarts long to realize I had to go.

       “On top of that, the natural gas supply system – drilling, fracking, processing and transportation -  is notorious for leaking greenhouse gases into the atmosphere.  The Smarts decided replacing me is just the first step toward weaning their home off of natural gas.  As appliances need replacing, they’ll swap them out for electric ones and maybe add a heat pump to reduce their furnace use.  A heat pump would use the ambient air temperature to both heat and cool their home,” Lee concluded.

       As he was wheeled into the truck, Lee couldn’t help but admire the collection of electric Energy Star certified appliance ready for delivery. “I’ve had my day,” Leaky mused. “Now it’s time to build a healthier, cleaner world.  After all, for humans and all creatures this is the only home they’ll ever know.  It’s where they’re all forever …Earthbound.”
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    I'm interested in the topics of sustainability and climate change especially in regards to our local area in southwest Wisconsin.

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